Madness

This has not been a good past couple of days for me. I am beyond exhaustion. Even my bones are wiped. I am probably not a good person to talk to right now, nor am I really in the mood for conversations, which is probably for the best anyhow. Sorry, Urs, I won't be calling you tonight on your cell, because it wouldn't be fair to you to do that. We'll see how things are on Sunday. Maybe bitching here will get rid of some of my negative enegery.

I'm kinda at the "I've had it!" place. I'm REALLY hoping not to take the next train to "Explosive outburst" town, instead to "I need some quiet reflection time" place. I realize it's a choice, don't need to tell me, I just need a moment. I didn't get a single solitary moment at all yesterday. I was at home with Isabel ALL DAY, from dawn till dusk. Jordy was at work at a "thing" and wasn't able to come home until 7:35, which at that point, Isabel was bathed, changed and feeding. My house was clean. My house was organized. I had clean sheets to sleep on that night. Not like the night before when I came home from my first day of class (which I'll get into in a bit), where I had babyfood all over my kitchen table, counters and sink, along with bibs, a taken apart high chair and just other useless crap strewn about. Not the same scene I had left 4 hours prior and am still unsure of how it got like that. I made my husband take a note of how clean my house was, when he got home last night and made a point of adding the fact that I was all alone. Bitchy, yes I know, but I felt justified. I know that most of the time the task of cleaning my house is somewhat redundant, but I feel it still needs to get done. Other people in my home clearly don't feel the same way. Anyway, not even an hour after I put Isabel down she woke up and SCREAMED bloody murder. And nothing would stop her crying and she did this twice. So Yes, no moments yesterday. Which just added more grr-ness to my pile.

The night before last I had my first class. All I am going to say about it is, despite the fact that there are some very nice people in my program, I do not feel like I fit in. I tried calling some friends and talking to my husband about it, but either no one was home or in the mood. That made me a bit sad. I also have to say about my class that even though I am a Child and Youth Care Worker, it was even too touchy feely for me. At the end, we all held hands and gave each other blessings. Too much warm fuzziness for me. But anyway, BEFORE class I found out our text books were FINALLY in at the bookstore. Only to get an email from my prof 5 days prior stating that they were not going to be in on time and was recommended we purchase them online. Which I did, and found out that one will be two weeks late. I am so annoyed with this university.

I am also struggling with customer service at The Province. Jordy loves his papers and I signed us up last year to receive them in the morning and in June my visa expired so I phoned and gave them all the new info. Then suddenly last week we were no longer receiving our papers so I emailed them. I was told that my credit card info needed to be updated. I replied saying it was back in June and this makes me uneasy giving out credit card info and then having it misplaced and if there was a miscommunication perhaps I should've received a phone call or letter asking for the updated info instead of just stopping delivery. Then I received the oddest email back, which I still don't understand. "Actually your credit information was updated last June but was not turn on for automatic payment. I email you notifying to update your credit card assuming you have a new one that is why the one we have on file that was indeed updated was never put back to automatic payment. I apologize for the inconvenience this may have cause you but I just like to make sure that you did give us permission to continue taking payment from your credit card. " Grammatically that makes no sense, right? Anyway, wouldn't the updated info be from a NEW credit card to begin with? How can I update info with an old card? That is so odd. And if I update my info and give you my new number I am automatically giving you permission to use it for payment. Why would I give you my number and say no you can't use it? So I'm going to try to call someone today to straighten this out.
Anway, I'm just annoyed and stressed. Hopefully my second class tomorrow will change things around.